Thats what I think. Move away from the source of your negative thoughts. 15. Totally the sort of thing that deserves a fist to the nose. The words I am so proud of you sum up those sentiments. You shouldnt be. She reciprocated. No, I am more proud of you, too. Sometimes a simple change of scenery might help you to stop thinking negative thoughts. I think that the phrase really bothers me, because its like saying, Wow, I didnt think you were good enough to ever achieve -insert whatever here.- My fiance said it to me last night while I was doing the dishes. I was an ambitious student with a goal to attend university, which my father completely supported. Is the childs achievement actually a reflection of their parents achievement? you see the work of your close friend and you tell him "I am proud of you". We had a really nice time. . 2. Likewise, these are special, cute, and funny replies when someone says I am proud of you and you dont know what to respond next. Love you so much. Thank you for starting this. How might you feel as the worker? Those of us who were brought up around this attitude are understandably wary of the phrase, and likely to avoid it. 16. 1. I also have to let go of holding it against him, because I presume it was a well-meaning gaffeinstead of saying how happy he is for me, as hes never been belittling before. 15. For what? 2. Setting goals you can achieve, also called "realist goals," reduces the chance of frustration or doubting yourself or your abilities. A teacher or a mentor can be proud of their student, but you can't really be proud of your peers. Because of this, it might feel awkward to say "I'm proud of you" to a friend or colleague, even if you mean it. Believe me when I tell you that it is not meant so kindly elsewhere. Can't you do something different?" By Ben Collins and Brandy Zadrozny. I know that it is in the nature of the internet that you can confirm, and get consensus about most any belief you have, but, if that is what has happened here, Im OK with it. For me, this was a huge take-away moment. until recently when a Goddaughter won an amazing internship, beating 2000 other applicants, and her other Godmother put a message on Facebook saying how proud she was of her. I believe you. For what? stories on the Parent Skills website are posted only as opinion or ideas, and are general in nature. Maybe instead of telling me hes proud of me, like its such a surprise, maybe he should have just offered to do the dishes. Yeah, If grandpa was here, he would have said the same. And, here are the respectful replies to respond with: 1. I did like here. But this will be seen as an overreaction. Focus on this thing or person for a few minutes to get yourself into a more positive mindset. Saying, Im proud of you, is a great word and its an expression from the heart. that he harrassed them or . Marilyn, My life changed the day I heard Mr. Rogers tell me he liked me just the way I was. As parents, it's important to stay calm and resist the urge to blame our kids or anyone else, really for our emotions. In other words, I care so much about the other person, that their accomplishment can evoke pride in ME. Even if the other person's words and/or actions seem reprehensible, try to be as . 3. However Simon Cowell for instance often says he is proud of a contestant he has never met before. Thank you so much. 2. Home / How Do I Respond To Im proud of you? So happy for us! 16. Hosted by Pressable. Thanks. It's a way of congratulating someone for having accomplished something impressive. Second, he must know you well. Whatever I did, I just did it for our friendship, Bro. 2. Yes, I think this is why my friend, even though older, was proud of me, I felt was being presumptious to put herself above me. Wondering where that may be coming from. The phrase that has always hit me hardest, however, has been "I'm proud of you." Someone saying that they're proud of you implies that, not only are they impressed by what you do and who you are, they also want others to know it. I dont think that without your support I can make it. It will show your appreciation for their words, it will help to strengthen your relationship, and it will create a positive and constructive environment. True - the parent might have spent hours helping the child get their homework done or even completing the childs assignment. but you do play a role in their success! If Your Partner Ever Says These 20 Things, You Should Break Up. . I cannot understand that and think he is misusing the word. You know that I'm bound to see you. Overall, its reserved for people who you trust and respect. I got into a conflice with her sons girlfriend because this young woman was working in a store behind the til and had made a gross error in punching out my cash register amounts on my bill and I had to go and confront her to get a refund as the store owed me about $50 due to her errors. This is when his feelings go deeper than the surface, and he genuinely cares about you as a person. Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool that can help to encourage and motivate people. Linda Adams, in her book Be Your Best, quotes Charleszetta Waddles (African American activist): You cant give people pride, but you can provide the kind of understanding that makes people look to their inner strengths and find their own sense of pride. posted by aimedwander at 4:27 PM on May 17, 2015 . Our children need to know that we believe in them, that we trust them, that we support them, that we love them, that we acknowledge them as individuals separate from us. Briefly, some difficulties include: Four-year-old John shows his Mum a painting he's just done. Continually acting to seek the approval of a parent is onerous for a child. One might consider that the mature thing to do, or the business savvy thing to do, but she has had nothing to do with them for years, because they are arrogant and condescending. Let them know that you are grateful for their support and that you appreciate their words. I guess its an odd word and I stay away from it because I know how sensitive I am to it. Rather than the child feeling respected for their efforts, they may feel patronised, put-down. Kids also like to know that they invoke parental prideas long as it genuine! Just the way you look and react to your husband can give the impression that you are honored to be his wife. We learn from every step we take. The phrase "Im proud of you" insinuates that the speaker (parent, teacher, co-worker, boss) has more experience, or power, or in some manner has the right to pronounce their opinion, on someone elses effort. At the same time, the paper stated that "a key is to ensure that children feel positively connected to their parents and family," and that parents needed to demonstrate to their children that "they cared about them", that they "had their back". If there is a mentor relationship, fine, but when the relationship is supposed to be about equals, Thank you, mom and dad, youre the reason for this. When someone tells you that they are proud of you, not only are they impressed by something you did and who you are, but they also want others to know it. "Im proud of you!" It got me thinking, "How many people could send me that sort of email?" "A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you." - C.S Lewis 2. The phrase, in my belief, implies my contribution as a parent. Youre the first person who is happy with it. Especially when your best friend is saying You make me proud, they arent just complimenting you. But what does proud mean? When my parents tell me that they are proud of me, I generally take it to mean that they recognize something I have done on my own merit as being worthy of praise. When someone says "I'm proud of you", they are expressing their admiration and respect for you - and that can be a powerful thing. I googled a sentence on this topic to see if anyone had written on it (hoping they had). However, is this what happens? On Wednesday, a Proud Boy leader, Joseph . 5. Thanks! Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude has many benefits. Especially when you get to hear this from your parents, it means theyre happy to see you grow up the way they raised you. Here are seven possible ways to interpret his compliment. You are happy they are an ambassador for you. We all have people in our lives who make us feel special, appreciated, and respected. Some years ago I attended a parenting seminar, where the speaker incidentally mentioned avoiding the phrase "Im proud of you". About 5 years ago, an ex college girlfriend and I began emailing each other occasionally (not often just once every 2-3 months or so). As a friend I want you to know that I am so proud of you. So, lets get started! Which brings me to my next point. Ive had multiple people tell me theyre proud of me like my parents, grandparents, elders but it just doesnt mean anything to me, I dont have any emotional response from any of them and my response ends up being ok or yup. But only emotionally intelligent people understand why. So we arranged to have her drive to the hotel where I was staying and we drove there together. Powered by WordPress. I dont know that you provided a litmus test, but the article acted as such for me. I have never said to my children, I am proud of you. My reason is that thry are responsile for their successes and I shoudnt take any credit for it. Instead of acting out of rage over . I felt great to know he as proud of me, especially after he had read my term report cards in high school. Ive been totally using that word all wrong sheesh, all the complaints about the misuse of the word makes me feel bad about what and how I been addressing my peers and friends. 11. You will even fall in love with me again seeing the next surprise! 12. The truth here is, different people say and hear different things in the expression Im proud of you.. Use thirty phrases to say "I'm proud of you" to make the special person feel good and empowered. It is an accomplishment that makes good memories in life. Children whose parents constantly say "I'm proud of you" may grow to be adults who rely on other people's opinion of them for validation. Please contact info@parentskills.com.au for further information. 12. It seems to me that the authors of the study used the phrase 'I'm proud of you' as a catch-all measurement, to reflect a parent's emotional connection with, and support, for, their child - and that it was this emotional involvement that provided protection against suicidal ideation. And now, that you have the other responses to I am proud of you, you can share the same based on whos saying this and after which event. If someone calls you boring: "Yeah, and what makes you so exciting?" Nothing,. Here I would say something like, Youre so talented!/Thats brilliant! I teach high school. I was actually kicked out of my house at 16 by her and her new husband and had financial trouble during my years in school that she had contributed to, how in the hell can she be proud of me when all she did was hinder me? I think its about the underlying meaning of these words to a child. 2. Fascinating post in two regards. I can see a peer, a spouse, or even a child saying that to someone who got a new deserved promotion, for instance. #8: They say you need to change. Specialized in marketing, with 'communication' as a favorite subject, Ketan P. is a head writer at 'Better Responses'. I am very proud of you too; we all are. When someone says Im proud of you, first of all thanking them is the common response we usually have. But worse, my friend thanked them. Although its worth taking a mental note of that in case a pattern does develop. I avoid "well done" or "good job" for all the reasons Ive stopped saying "Im proud of you". But is that really very useful? So thank you Ben, for after read the above I feel happy with my Im thrilled for you, You must feel really proud and the like. I think the internet and social media have eaten her brain that she would not only allow their @#[emailprotected] clueless comment to remain public, but that she thanked them? . This is what makes the difference in whether the receiver feels great or resentful. Thanks. I very quickly responded with a snappy, Why? He said because you were up last night with the baby, and went to work, and youre still cleaning this late at night. Um What a shock that I am hardly sleeping, cleaning constantly, working again, taking care of two babies, doing his laundry/dishes/cooking It really rubbed me the wrong way that he was proud of me. You certainly will. Just let them be. Most of the time, having pride about someone else comes from a place of superiority. We love all of our readers and we want to you to know how much youre appreciated! My former partner just recently told me that he was proud of me after major accomplishment. Friend: "At least you have a job or daughter.". Your thoughts and ideas are so creative, which has allowed you to refine your talent into something unique from others. Hearing those words can make us feel seen, understood, and appreciated. The child has done well enough for the parent to bring out the big guns the proud word. Larissa Dann, a veteran trainer of Parent Effectiveness Training in Australia, suggests that we stop saying "I am proud of you," and start saying, "I am proud for you." 1 It is a subtle shift from the accomplishment being about the parent to the accomplishment being about the child. 9. I would almost join FB in order to make the comment, Why are you proud and impressed? Your friend wants to say "I am proud of you too, my friend". Then there's emotional attraction. Here are other litmus tests I've blogged about. That makes you a living miracle. So, how should we respond to Im proud of you? In this blog, well take a look at Im proud of you and how to respond to it in a meaningful way. Also, as bilabial says, I like the recognize traits he values in himself, like his thoroughness and carefulness. Oh, thank you, friend. . I'm so much proud of you for completing your graduation and wish you will succeed in every . But I believe that spouses say it, and siblings. Feb 10, . It isnt. Express your own feelings of appreciation and gratitude. As if Im mentally retarded and reading a book for the first time in my life, and hoping to get a cookie and a star sticker. Let them know that you are grateful for their support. ie you have brought them up as parents and are proud of them for their achievements or manners etc. But you'd like some clarity on what he really means when he says that. My native language is not English, but I have fallen into the unfortunate (for somethings) of social netwoks, like facebook. An acquaintance commented on a recent Facebook post I made that he was proud of me and immediately I felt so mad about that but couldnt figure out why. They seem to make him quite happy. Show your appreciation for their words and use your response to create a positive and constructive environment. Who is saying this to whom? After reading these posts, I think the following: a person will feel pride in anothers accomplishment when they feel deeply connected with the other. And Ill encourage them to be proud. It may not display this or other websites correctly. They may find it difficult to take pride in who they are and what they have achieved. It does not take it away from them. The key words (for this discussion) are creditable to oneself. "I'm proud of you" is often associated with mentor-mentee relationships, something that a teacher or parent might say. The words hit me like a . So you better know in which tone theyre saying so. You worked so hard, you really deserve that job! Well, in that case, you should be proud of yourself, too. Anyone who overthinks any form of compliments or think's that there are hidden agendas or people are not being completely honest about what they say, should take a step back and ask themselves why they are thinking those thoughts, personally i believe it's more about them and not what is being said about the phrase. Focus on what is positive in their life and avoid getting overly . Approval is different to acceptance. Im so glad that youre there for giving me support. I am in awe of your talent and accomplishments. 4 . Thats why we feel pride in our childrens accomplishments. The next morning, I woke up to an email in my inbox that was one line: "I'm really proud of you." Just think of The Sixth Sense, where the son tells his mother that his dead grandmother wanted her daughter to know that the answer to her unspoken question was Every day., His mother begins to cry, and he asks her, What did you ask grandma, and she replies through her tears, Are you proud of me?. To reply to that right, here are the better and funny responses to I am proud of you from your bestie. But who are you to affirm? I am certain that he would be very proud of you, and he would be proud of your decision to reset your life with rehab. 2. And if one doesnt respect ones parent, what is the reaction to such a statement? You had nothing whatsoever to do with any of this you pond-bottom suckers.. Knowing someone is proud of you, is indeed one of the most rewarding feelings in the world. . All rights reserved. I was damned proud of her for overcoming this setback and told her so. In what context? 3. . Its all because of blessings and good wishes, I could do it. To be proud of yourself for your success is one thing, for another is to be proud, they had better have seen you come up through the trenches to witness that moment or to have been involved in the process. Last week, I went back to my college homecoming without my wife. What would replace this oh-so-common parenting expression? But I want to let you know that I accept you whether I agree with you or not, and I'm committed to working on our relationship so we both feel . I am trying very, very hard not to implode. Don't remind them how far they've come. 5. Towards Net Zero. A Macquarie Dictionary definition of proud is: feeling pleasure or satisfaction over something conceived as highly honourable or creditable to oneself. They know I mean: I am so impressed by what you did, and proud to be able to call myself your mother. If I said this to a friend it would mean the same thing. . [Chorus] They say redemption's on your mind when you think about . Simply thanking them or hugging them is an immediate reaction to it. Next course: We hope to run a face to face course beginning in early May, 2023. I don't think you . 2. A: It's not necessarily wrong to take pride in our work, of course; if we don't, our work will probably end up sloppy or incomplete. relationship advice marriage advice Women love advice. 1. It says, I love you so much that YOUR accomplishment can make ME feel pride. Id opt for saying, Im happy for you. These two simple words"I care"can mean so much to a person who may be feeling like the entire world is against them. Like I wasnt doing enough before? Image used under license from Shutterstock, research suggesting that parents saying "I'm proud of you", protective role in a their child's mental health, Should Children And Parents Be Friends? Originally Published: March 28, 2018. momcilog/E+/Getty . From that day on, I felt like I couldnt really trust him, and now I know why. The Psychology of Bragging. Instead, I try implementing the approach from Parent Effectiveness Training (PET), a peaceful, gentle approach to parenting, that teaches respectful communication skills, and offers alternatives to using rewards (such as praise), or punishments (such as saying "Im disappointed"). After the game I took her back to her car, gave her a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. But what exactly does this phrase mean and how should you respond to it? 9. I was talking about this statement Im Proud of you to a friend.I was annoyed about someone saying they were proud of me who barley knows me. PJ, I think your ex still cares for you so your accomplishments evoke pride in her. PJ, I will give my thoughts on your post at the end of my post. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Facebook: Please join us on our Facebook page for a mix of articles on children and parenting. When someone knows that you are not only proud, but you are inspired and amazed, it will be an even better compliment. But the Bible warns us against a self-centered, egotistical pride that says, "Look at me; look at . When you respond to someones words of admiration with gratitude, youre showing that you value and respect them. The effect of this praise might be opposite to the aim of the parent. To try to sum this up, I mrried and ended up in a small, isolated village filled with people who either did not graduate high school or barely achieved that level of schooling. Family Tree. What a surprise! . Self-doubt can make it hard to accept compliments and to express gratitude for the words of others. Why is your manager taking credit for the work you put into the report? I can make it possible only because you give me hope. Everything you do is with excellence. Im proud of myself, although saying it out loud doesnt make it better. 6. But this seems less common. Your partner is really happy about the achievement that you have made in your life or career. First, is there anything more emotionally potent than someone you really care about and admire telling you, Im proud of you?, It feels like I can name many movies where this serves as the emotional climax. My ex just said the same thing to me yesterday and it just didnt sound right to me. Its really a way of saying I am really the one who is special, Im the boss.and what it deserves is not thank you but rather, well kiss my ass you condescending bastard..get a lifethis proud of you nonsense is also related to people who have to say WELL GOOD FOR YOU when doing something mundane..like, someone catches me reading a book in publicoh, you are readingWELL, GOOD FOR YOU!! "I'm so proud of you" In this sentence, "proud" being translated to is absolutely right, and is also OK. "I know how you feel". "), Parent: "Im proud that you got all As in your school report/won that tennis trophy", How might you feel as the child? Congratulations on your graduation, dear son. So, the next time someone says Im proud of you, remember to take the time to think about how you want to respond. This will show your appreciation for their support and will help to strengthen your relationship. You are using an out of date browser. Do you think if they didn't mean it they would say it? Second, he must know you well. By accepting the compliment and reflecting on your qualities, you may feel more satisfied in life. As your friend I want you to know that there is nothing I wouldn't do for you. And family can often be proud, but as with most things family, the obligation and bias dull the effect. The insiders felt they were all superior to newcomers, no matter what the newcomers backgrounds were. (My answer might surprise you. Make sure to take the time to think about how you want to respond. ), Partner: "I'm proud of you for landing that job", While you might understand that your partner is being supportive, might you also feel a bit miffed? "We will always remember. She only ever said it once but it has stuck with me forever: 3. Suddenly I found myself questioning my rather lame Im thrilled for you. Think of things people have often praised. The rest were manual labourers. The parent might have paid a lot of money, or given up time, to coach and practice tennis with their winning child. The administrator takes no responsibility for any action or outcome a reader may make as a result of reading a post. Otherwise I feel like Im horning in on someone elses territory their right to be proud of their own accomplishments. You reject that person's generosity. Exactly the information I was looking for thank you! 27. From what I read, she falls into the category of know them well but I wonder if its not something a bit out of place. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. I am proud of them for being like this with one another. For Stein, the worst compliment is hearing: "You've lost soooo much weight! If its a long-term relationship, the mentor will genuinely care. We laughed a lot and re-lived some old memories. I now understand that its because I dont feel superiority over anyone, and Im perfectly happy with that . Im so happy to have you in my life, thanks! Based on the situation and who says this, heres a list of better responses to pick. Well cover some of the better responses you can give, like thanking them, making them feel special, or making them laugh. But to be proud of them? You cannot be proud of anything you were born with, only with what you achieve. Be proud of you." - Oprah Winfrey 3. Thats my life goal. Second, this very fact helps explain why we resent it if the praise comes from someone who isnt viewed as a mentor. After all, you were the one who put the effort into writing the report you did the research, you put the paper together. Youll feel mad and resentful. Initially this sit didnt sit well with me. Its powerful. Your email address will not be published. "Always work hard, be honest, and be proud of who you are.". Renew your PET skills; complete the full course over flexible times; or one-off parenting sessions. Do you really think this had a lot of positive impact on many children? Who put in the practice in order to win that tennis match? Let them know you think it's great they're considering quitting and that you're ready to help. It remains condescending and arrogant. Without you, I couldnt do it. While "sb is proud of him" can express positive meaning. She says "Good boy. It means she feels proud for what you've done or achieved. 13. By the fifth repeat of the painting, the response from him mother may quite different from the first. . He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. Its a way of saying I see the hard work youve put in and I appreciate it. 7. If you feel stuck on getting that pride going or can't seem to identify the traits or qualities you're most proud of in yourself, go back in time. Well also discuss the power of words, the benefits of responding with gratitude, and how to show appreciation to others. Because we ran into a bunch of other classmates that were also there, we didnt spend time exclusively with each other but we did sit together at the game. She was very rude and grouchy with me and reluctantly corrected her errors after I asked the manager to get involved. I feel virtually murderous towards them. I am so lucky to have you in my life and your . When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies. As in, he's purely attracted to your appearance. Partner: "You think you have a lot going on, let me tell you . The only people there who went to university were the pharmacist, the physician/surgeon, lab technologist, x-ray technician and the like, as well as the school teachers. With the best of intentions, we want to let our children know of our pride in them. 24. "How I do love you!" You look so much better!". I have always seen it as, Ive been there, done that, and think you have done it too.. I dont think my children have any problem with this because they know, in many other ways, I love them dearly. But I gratuitously accepted his compliment. I had a lot of this type of treatment in that small community. He may not have expected you to be qualified for the job. Narcissism can be a personality trait and a mental health disorder, and someone can have narcissistic tendencies without being labeled a "narcissist." When you live with narcissistic. I agree that its a phrase that is really reserved for the individual doing, or accomplishing something, i.e. May these Proud Quotes On Success inspire you to take action so that you may live your dreams. Patricia Velasquez. Well, that truly makes my day. 7. Tell Them You Care. I wouldnt say Im proud of you in this situation. John decides to replicate his painting (for the reward of praise, not for his own sense of improvement and competence), and looks up at his mother with rapturous expectation.
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